Before the cock crows twice...

[Blank Rune]

Snapshot...14 Feb 1993


The contemplative meditation begins...

Do I know him? I know his name and do not deny that, but do I know Jesus personally? I have known my Father from the beginning, since I was as young as I can remember. I have always known my Father, the source of all things. Why haven’t I known Jesus personally? I don’t know him personally…
O-God! I’m sorry. What is wrong with me?

Contemplation continues…Jesus Christ why haven’t I had a personal relationship with you… I know your name and do not deny that, but do I know you personally? I have known my Father from the beginning, since I was as young as I can remember. I have always known my Father, the source of all things. Why haven’t I known you personally? Do I know Jesus Christ personally? No, I don’t know him personally…
O-God! What am I doing, what is wrong with me?

Contemplation continues…I can not remember ever having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ…I know his name and believe in the power of his name and know of him, but I do not know him personally…
The cock crows [I am in the city and it is not dawn], the cock crows a second time!
O-my God what have I done [parallel time begins] Noooo! [Jesus Christ is being crucified] nooooooooo pleeeeeaaaassse don’t let this happen again!! Do it to me…he has gone through so much pain already…noooooooo stop!!!! Let me take his place…O-God I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…Pleeeeeaaaaasssseee!!!
[The cross is being erected before my eyes] It’s my fault! It’s my fault!!!
[The vision ceases and the light comes…]


Please share any contemplative meditation experiences you may have had along the path, especially with regards to Jesus Christ / Sophia.



N. _________

[ShadowFox]

I personally think of the persona of Jesus as cliche because of all the hypocritical religious influence I had to put up with in my younger years.

I personally like to think of Jesus in more terms of his Consciousness, the Christ/Buddhic consciousness rather than his actual or fictitious persona..

Personally I don't believe in the concept "Jesus died on the cross to save us from our sins" or some other overemotional but nonrational hogwash. Rather, Jesus came to teach us of a Higher Consciousness, but the authorities didn't like his anti-hypocrite attitude and framed him and had him killed.

There is only your Consciousness, and the byproducts of said Consciousness. If you have a lower, egoic Consciousness then naturally suffering and disconnection from God will result from the distorted perception of reality, and this suffering will spread to others. This is what sin really is. Thus the raising of our consciousness is our real duty towards "salvation" or whatever you want to call it. Our sins arent magically "washed away". They disappear when your ego stops deluding itself.

I believe that Christian Catholicism is most responsible for people's guilt over something they never had any control over. Like how people mope and groan about their sinful nature and then pray and beg God to do something about it, and to forgive them and so and so... In the history of the Catholic church there have been many perverse self-mortifying practices done in the name of "penance", like how here in the Philippines people walk around in the streets on Holy Week and lacerate themselves with razor sharp flails on their back while uttering prayers asking for "forgiveness".. It may seem spiritual wbut when it's really just dumb and neurotic.

We can't really beat ourselves up over something we have no control over such as our "inherently sinful" nature.. Sexuality and its expression is nothing to go to hell about or feel bad for.

People make decisions now in the present based on the information and options availabe to them in the moment. When that moment passes and we find out that what we did wasn't the "right" thing to do we beat ourselves up over it, we call ourselves stupid and start the self-loathing. But we never really learn to accept that no one can make the right decisions all the time because we can't see into the future. We don't know everything to begin with. And there was never a decision in our whole lives that we haven't chosen the best action to take in that moment. To me this is egoism when you beat yourself when you made the best decision you could in the first place.

[Blank Rune]

I personally think of the persona of Jesus as cliche because of all the hypocritical religious influence I had to put up with in my younger years.

I personally like to think of Jesus in more terms of his Consciousness, the Christ/Buddhic consciousness rather than his actual or fictitious persona..

Personally I don't believe in the concept "Jesus died on the cross to save us from our sins" or some other overemotional but nonrational hogwash. Rather, Jesus came to teach us of a Higher Consciousness, but the authorities didn't like his anti-hypocrite attitude and framed him and had him killed.

There is only your Consciousness, and the byproducts of said Consciousness. If you have a lower, egoic Consciousness then naturally suffering and disconnection from God will result from the distorted perception of reality, and this suffering will spread to others. This is what sin really is. Thus the raising of our consciousness is our real duty towards "salvation" or whatever you want to call it. Our sins arent magically "washed away". They disappear when your ego stops deluding itself.

I believe that Christian Catholicism is most responsible for people's guilt over something they never had any control over. Like how people mope and groan about their sinful nature and then pray and beg God to do something about it, and to forgive them and so and so... In the history of the Catholic church there have been many perverse self-mortifying practices done in the name of "penance", like how here in the Philippines people walk around in the streets on Holy Week and lacerate themselves with razor sharp flails on their back while uttering prayers asking for "forgiveness".. It may seem spiritual wbut when it's really just dumb and neurotic.

We can't really beat ourselves up over something we have no control over such as our "inherently sinful" nature.. Sexuality and its expression is nothing to go to hell about or feel bad for.

People make decisions now in the present based on the information and options availabe to them in the moment. When that moment passes and we find out that what we did wasn't the "right" thing to do we beat ourselves up over it, we call ourselves stupid and start the self-loathing. But we never really learn to accept that no one can make the right decisions all the time because we can't see into the future. We don't know everything to begin with. And there was never a decision in our whole lives that we haven't chosen the best action to take in that moment. To me this is egoism when you beat yourself when you made the best decision you could in the first place.

Wow ShowFox it looks like you have an ax to grind...I would love to give you my opinion of everything you just wrote, but that is not what this thread is all about. You were supposed to share any experiences you had during contemplative meditation. If don't have anything to contribute with regards to that then you don't.

I also said..."especially regarding Jesus Christ/Sophia" in order to give the members "a hint" that I am a christian (esoteric) and am studying gnostic scripture and though I am interested in starting a thread where everyone can share their experiences during contemplative meditation I am even more so (interested) in regard to Jesus Christ/Sophia.

I expect everyone to respect each others beliefs, experiences, etc. I do not want anyone to bash anyone elses beliefs or try to make them feel silly or ashamed about what they have experienced along the path.

I intentionally chose that "snapshot" for a couple of reasons, one of which was to give the feeling to anyone reading it that it was ok to share anything...including the most intimate, sensitive, etc. Basically, to just lay it out there.

Please allow me to thank you in advance for your future cooperation.




N. _________

[Briony Haldane]

When I was quite young [about 18], I had a very prolonged and profound state of "connection" to the whole Easter experience, beginning with the procession on Plam Sunday through to the crucifixion. I stayed apart from daily life and meditated and visualized and became very emotionally acute to those long ago events. I still remember it very well. I have never had that experience again, and likely wouldn't now as it is no longer my path.

I remember hearing the sounds of crowd and feeling the elation at the plam Sunday procession and the condemnation on the way to Golgotha..the songs of jubilation and praise no longer on their lips..only cursing and revilement..my own amazement at the fickle mentality of the crowd..it seemed very personal..and the utter devastation as life seemingly passed from the body of Jesus..I was singing at a coffee house that night and had to leave the stage in tears, unable to explain..

[Celtaur]

In consideration of Jesus through contemplation or meditation I feel that I connect like ShadowFox to the Christ Consciousness rather than the persona and historical/political associations.

For me contemplation in this allows a purity of the symbolism to shine through. Feelings of guilt do not arise, nor anger, or anything of a lower vibration, but a higher energy. I do not usually question or dialog so much, but rather visualize and feel the experience relative to my focus. In visualization of Jesus as a person I do not associate to the cross so much but the teacher, the wise man, the energy of a healer and giver. There is a purity there, a holiness of intention.

I have a picture of Jesus in a garden knocking on a door which was given to me by my dear grandmother, and I do love this imagery and contemplate on its significance. To me it reveals a spiritual beingness in the presence of nature, open portals and doorways of consciousness, a willingness to open to something new, something inherently good, positive, loving. To me this image brings a connection of my love of earthliness, to nature and the magic it presents of flowers, leaves, growth, processes that are divinely inspired. In this garden is the presence of life of the plants but also of the conscious being represented by Jesus, cloaked in a blue, peaceful, serene, kind, honest, loving.

The symbolism of Jesus ascension from the lower earthly self of suffering to the promise of higher consciousness and heightened spiritual experience of love is powerful, hopeful and promising.

The symbolism of the physical, personal Jesus figure does allow for easier association and parallels to the self, the beingness of life, but for me in meditative experience this is not necessary, but can assist in the process of feeling a sense of communion with the spirit world.

I can not say I have meditated specifically on Jesus, but have on the Christ Consciousness in association to Tipareth, seeing the center of the macrocosm with the microcosm of the light. This brings me to places of union with light, releasing ego to be filled with lightness. This also brings up much symbolism of the ego falling away like the hanged man who becomes enlightened.

I go to interesting places when contemplating the light, and it becomes a beautiful experience that resonates through my being.

[Briony Haldane]

ackk..I see Palm Sunday mis-spelled twice..*covers eyes*

I think any experience that takes us to a place of understanding and compassion
is a valuable one. Forty years later [almost] I remember it very well. I see it as
being an important step on my path at that time..certainly I don't see myself as being there now..

I often wondered if it was a "bleedthrough" from a life in that time as the detail was
quite exquisite and the emotions acute, "mine", but "not mine".

[LadyofBlackLions]

"There are many paths in the labyrinthe, but only One center of Divine Universal Light."
The names/words "Jesus Christ or The Christ Child, Christ Light" simply describes the manifestations of the aspect of Being known as TRUTH,
in all realms, on all planes, in all dimensions, on all frequencies... in this known universe.

Alban Eiler, 2003 (Easter)

My brother, (known by many as Jesus Christ), walked with me into the water of the lake where I lived at that time. We stood exactly 9 meters from shore; the depth of the water was knee high. The early dawn threshold was breaking into the day, sunny and bright. The morning mists swirling, floating mysteriously across the glassy mirror of the distant shoreline.
As I gazed out over a gentle ripple, I realized I was descending to the bottom of the lake and shapeshifting into...
Looking down I could see that my legs were now the tail of a fish - the colour was illuminous and glowing emerald green in this watery realm. My torso was still that of my human form - an auburn haired Selkie woman. I feel the "awe" of perfection.
Suddenly, the powerful arms of the Sea God, Manannan mac Lir , (Poseidon/King Neptune to some), thrust me upwards through the waters of the lake. We were surfacing, and as we broke the surface of the water, Manannan, in one powerful and smooth movement, threw me high into the air as his arms and my "mermaid" tail became One - we were transformed into a golden/white eagle - soaring higher and higher into the crystal, azure sky. As I gazed downward, surveying the surface of the lake from whence I had just arisen, I saw Him, still standing in the knee deep water - and we were ONE...

This was my "Greater Initiation", and this is what was revealed to me through it...
Peace, Love and Light,
Lady

Some Insight:

To understand the role of any individual, (and/or their generation), at this time in the evolution of humankind, we must first recognize the purpose of every life journey and incarnation.

There are only two purposes to any life path: a) to learn how to let go of fear and (b) to
learn how to express unconditional love. Once we have reclaimed our natural powers and gifts
we ascend into the higher dimensions and vibrate at these higher frequencies.
Picture a piano's keyboard.
The lower the notes of the musical scale, and the lower the keys, the thicker, denser and slower the vibrational tones emitted. The higher notes and higher keys of the keyboard produce a clearer, crisper sound. Middle "c" on the piano's keybaord is equal to the average, vibrational frequencies of the third/fourth dimension. One may chose to vibrate on the higher or lower frequencies from here.

Some people are very slow and "thick" in their abilities to learn and evolve. They vibrate at the lower, denser frequencies of this physical third/fourth dimensional realm because they have so much baggage, addictions, karmic debt, etc., to clear, heal and dissolve. Only through the grace of forgiveness are we able to dissolve this Karmic debt. As we heal from past mistakes and life experiences, we become more aware of our higher "God" self and ascend the piano's keyboard to vibrate on higher frequencies. In other words we grow and evolve. When we express our passions through peace, unconditional love and joy, our "light" or "aura" shines and forgiveness becomes pre-granted because we are now aware that we all walk as One Divine Light of Truth (God, Jesus, Buddah - by any name, word, symbol, or label).
If One continues to refuse to accept responsibility for One's own choices, is not accountable for the harm done, then One continues to blame everything and everybody for everything and will never evolve... will never experience "death" (which is the transformation from one state of being into another, just a different form, shape and state of being), and they will "die" (which is to become no known thing in this known universe) -
"self annihilate".

It is also essential to understand that all aspects of your life are "chosen". Before you chose to accept a physical "vessel" to experience this third/fourth dimension, (in other words "be born"), with the assistance of guides and Masters, you chose the life path and life experiences you required, to "know" and become consciously aware of, in order to learn, grow and evolve. You have chosen every step of your life that you have taken, whether you realize it or not. To fulfill the universal contracts you hold with all cosmic entities of all universes, (your honour) you must look at every occurence throughout this incarnation and all previous lifetimes and ask yourself what it is that you are seeking to learn and become aware of... your "universal truth". This is revealed through the specific life experience, at the precise moment of "death".
(Hint: The newborn babe experiences "death" as it becomes the enfant; the enfant experiences "death" as it becomes the child; the child becomes the adolescent through the same transformational process, and so on throughout your lifetime).

??? Let go of the "power over" created control and coersion, mis-interpretations and misunderstandings. Think outside the box. Learn to be patient. Learn to be still. The truth will come shining through. Remember, all experience is directly or indirectly related to the two purposes of your life's journey. Be gentle with your "light" self, (the true self), and your shadow self, (the ego-created self). You are a child of the universe - an essential, integral, equal part of the collective consciousness of the universal whole. A single strand of hair in an infinite, eternal braid of "god" light - an infinite being.

"All that was, all that is, and all that will be, is within you. All One needs to do is learn how to remember", and,
"Nothing is right, nothing is wrong, nothing is good, nor bad, until you react to it and make it so." This is your universal rights to free will, and freedom of choice. The challenges and conflicts arise when One forgets that universal law states:

You have no right to control any other life journey, entity or thing except yourself.

To power over another is to do harm and steal universal right away from those you rule by fear or any other means of powering over them. Our natural powers and gifts come from within, not through powering over.

See? Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance... why?
because, the true self is perfect. The ego-created self creates challenges and conflicts to experience "comparison". We do not become immortal - we are immortal. We have now evolved to the point of conscious awareness and knowing. We are, now, returning to our true "God" self.
"Without the experience of misery, how would you ever be able to recognize the twin ray/brother - joy?" It is all the same energy - one being a negative energy flow - the other being a positive energy flow.

Examine the roles of the individuals, the roles of their generations - explore the past history to recognize the future. It is all the same energy, no?

Until now... Choose wisely, Sweetness. Will you allow history to repeat itself and succeed at self annihilation ? Check out the Law of Return, Law of Attraction...

or

Will you heal and shift with this brave new world of One, by letting it all go, give that which does harm no energy, and shift into the fifth, and higher dimensions?

Remember: Nothing ever happens in the past or in the future. Everything happens in the moment - Now.
Doing is everything... your universal right " to be" .

Ancient Wisdom:

"When I doubt the most, I hold the most faith."

Doubt and faith are twin rays/brothers. Aren't we clever for having created "immortality"?


I AM Presence
I AM Truth...

[Lasting Quiet]

I believe that Jesus was a remarkable holy man and great healer.

If you read his words in the New Testament you cannot help but be inspired by the man, his actions and his love of the Father and for others.

Although raised Catholic, I have not practised as such since adolescence. Nor am I a Christian although I certainly believe that Jesus existed. I like the idea of 'Christ-consciousness', however. although I have just a simple understanding of what it means.

It is a beautiful post, Blank Rune .

[Lasting Quiet]

I guess I am not sure about the story that Jesus died for our sins. Part of my doubt about this comes from the knowledge that both New and Old Testaments have been edited so many times that it is hard to know the truth of it all. I have preferred to see both texts as largely metaphorical although I do believe that Jesus existed.

Some of the original meaning of the Jesus story has been lost through the politicisation of the Church but there is enough there to be inspirational.

Your post is a personal meditation, Blank Rune, and I took it as such. I would enjoy seeing where you go next with this. Sometimes I do similar meditations on images such as those one sees on Tarot cards, or other beautiful images. It's sometimes called entering the card.

[LT]

What Comes to mind is one thing! This was you being crucified!
You longed for a personal relationship with the one, the Christ with in you!
And you got it! It seems that is what it was, you are now one with the Christ within you!
You knew his name, you knew his teachings, yet you wanted more than that, you wanted connection. and you got it! That is what comes to mind! Hope it shed some light! other than that! Beautiful meditation! I wish I could have such an experience!

Then again! I believe I may have!

Here is my story!

I lay in the hospital bed 3 days after my 2nd surgery!
I lay there contemplating life, and thy purpose in it! I lay there think ever so philosophical!
And I ask these questions either 3 times or 7 times. And after doing so.
I felt my arms stretch out, my legs straighten out. And extreme pain in my palms, feet and my skull. as if prickly sensations on my head. and a lot of cuts on my back! I then saw a light! A very bright one, and in the center there was a cross! It went form being a large cross to quite a very small one! As if The cross became a circle or a dot!
All I know is that i see it as clear as day when i remember it. I was crucified on my bed.
My doctors told me when I stretched my arms out the machine that beeped to show i was alive and well. started beeping really load! And then stopped for a second! I then awoke according to them! They said it happens quite allot. They cant explain it though!

I knew it was me becoming one with the Christ within me. It felt so good! From then on I saw things quite different! I heard things different as well.. All things changed, as if i awakened from a deep sleep! It was a wonderful experience!

Anyways, Thats my story. Do what you wish with it. Think what you wish of it. Believe it or don't believe it. But that is my experience that will stick with me forever!

Love & Light Be With You! So That it is with me!
Liam